We know that leadership is a lonely journey. For years, I have worked with leaders from corporate sectors, higher education, faith-based institutions, and NGOs. If there is one thing common among us all, it is the neglect of personal wellness. So why do we, who are otherwise caring individuals, care less for ourselves? We often know a great deal about wellness but fail to prioritize habits that promote it. Are there any benefits to our team and the work we do if we invest in our mental wellness?

Poor mental wellness among leaders doesn’t just affect us personally—it impacts every employee and the organization's culture. When we neglect our mental wellness, our decision-making capabilities suffer, leading to inconsistent strategies and a lack of clear direction. Our stress can trickle down to the organization, lowering morale. Employees may consider leaving for more supportive environments. At an organizational level, this neglect doesn’t just have emotional implications; it can also affect profitability. Organizations thrive when leaders are mentally healthy and engaged.

Neglect often begins with good intentions but can end badly for us and the teams we lead. We become so invested in our work that we fail to prioritize our own well-being. We frequently serve as punching bags for our team’s frustrations but rarely create adequate support systems for ourselves. We tend to mask our vulnerabilities and focus on projecting our strengths. However, we fail to recognize that every strength comes with associated vulnerabilities. For instance, a leader whose strength is achievement and who drives the organization with that value may be prone to burnout. This, in turn, impacts mental wellness and ultimately leads to ineffective leadership. Or consider leaders whose strength is connectedness. They can be prone to taking rejections to heart.

Neuroscience research today tells us that continuous neglect of wellness among leaders leads to ingrained behaviors and mindsets that become difficult to change. When we consistently overlook our mental well-being, we subject our brains to prolonged stress. This chronic stress triggers an overproduction of cortisol, the stress hormone, which can impair the hippocampus—the brain region responsible for learning and memory. This impairment makes it harder to process new information and adapt to change, causing us to cling to familiar behaviors even when they are no longer effective.

One reason for this is what I call the competition (or conflict) between leadership truths and personal beliefs. Leadership truths are universal and apply across teams and organizations, whereas personal beliefs are shaped by our early and later life experiences, as well as our core psychological needs. For example, a universal leadership truth is that leaders cannot please everyone, even when acting in the organization's best interest. However, we may tend to be people-pleasers and hold a competing personal belief that we must win the approval of our team and superiors. Similarly, we may believe that our hard work deserves recognition and appreciation. Yet this belief conflicts with another leadership truth: leaders do not necessarily receive rewards from those they lead, despite caring for their welfare. These mental conflicts create unhelpful emotional responses—disappointment, sadness, loneliness, self-doubt, burnout—and can manifest as physical health issues such as ulcers, hypertension, insomnia, depression, and anxiety.

A crucial step toward nurturing wellness among leaders is to address our well-being needs with compassion. Examining the values upon which our leadership is built and exploring how personal beliefs shape our thinking and behavior can be particularly useful. Once we recognize these patterns, it becomes easier to create and seek support, build resilience, and transition from neglect to nurturing wellness. However, prioritizing wellness is not just an act of compassion—it is also a strategic move. Organizations that invest in the mental wellness of their leaders are also investing in a healthier, more engaged, respectful, and psychologically safe workplace.